Sunday, April 13, 2014

15/52 - A portrait a week

So many of my photos of Mia seem to be of her sleeping!  Actually, I've found in the last few weeks I've hardly been taking any photos of all, so I really need to get back on top of that.  On this occasion though, Mia and I were home alone enjoying some quiet time together, she was drawing at the table while I was preparing dinner, with the TV on next to her.  About 10 minutes before dinner was ready, I looked up to see her asleep like this in her chair.  The poor little cherub, she was so exhausted after a big day at childcare.  Falling asleep out of the blue like this is something I think she's only done once before, it took me by surprise!  I woke her up in time for dinner but she was groggy and cranky, saying she didn't want dinner, or a shower, or stories, she just wanted to sleep.  So she went straight to bed, without her dinner or a shower, a first for her.

We've had some behaviour issues to deal with in the past few weeks, and with all the big changes about to come up over the next month in this little girl's life, I'm not surprised and we're trying to be as patient and caring as we can with her and keeping an eye on her.  Sometimes she likes to talk about her new baby brother and what it will be like when he comes along, and what our new house is like, other times she doesn't want to hear a bar of it.  And with the house move looming over our heads, Hubby and I are still feeling a little stressed at this point, and I'm well aware that some of our stress could rub off on Mia at times when she witnesses us talking about the house (sometimes arguing), problem-solving, and generally running around like headless chickens. 

I just hope any worries or stress that she might be carrying will melt away once she sees the awesome outdoor cubby house at our new place, when we pick up the keys next week!

Linking up with a vast array of pictorial goodness at Practising Simplicity, as part of the 52 Project.

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

34 weeks

So. Much. Pain.

Feet, neck, knees, thighs, hips, pelvis, butt, shoulders, abdomen,'s all hurting right now!

My hunch that I'm bigger this time around than I was with Mia is right.  I had my last ultrasound recently (I was given two additional ones after 20 weeks to keep an eye on baby's growth, due to Mia being born at a low weight), and was given an estimate of the baby's current weight, which is the exact same weight Mia was when she was born at 39 weeks!  This does freak me out a little, it makes me think the baby is due to come out any minute now if he is now the size of Mia at birth.  But on the other hand I know that every pregnancy is different and have been told many times that Mia's unexpected low weight was likely a stand-alone event and there's nothing to show that this would be repeated with a second baby.  And, if this baby grows just a little bit more, and (fingers crossed) is happy and healthy when he is born, he won't have to go in the nursery and can stay on the maternity ward with me until we go home!  Hooray!  I would just love that.

Below is a picture of me at 32 weeks pregnant with Mia, wearing the exact same top as above.  Eerily similar isn't it?!

Apart from the constant aches and pains, I find it difficult to pinpoint exactly how I'm feeling most days, as it seems to change quite frequently!  I've noticed quite a few differences between my two pregnancies.  The first-trimester yukkies were about the same between the two, but maybe slightly worse this time around - no vomiting apart from one or two incidents (hallelujah for that, I don't know how some women do it), just feeling like I was hungover 24/7.  In the second trimester last time, what I remember most is the horrible sciatic pain I was having, which I didn't get this time.  And apart from that, my energy seemed to gather and increase with each passing day during my second and third trimesters with Mia, and I felt great most of the time.  This time however, I've felt tired and drained, restless, itchy and uncomfortable in my own skin.  No ball of energy here!

This one seems to cause me more pain when he moves around than Mia did as well.  Just like Mia, he punches me very low at times (to the point where I feel like he's moving down in to my thighs!) and very high at times (hello ribcage).  I've also had a fair share of significant abdominal pain this time round which I don't remember having with Mia, mostly lower ab pain which at times has been sharp enough to make me gasp.  Braxton Hicks?  And for the past couple of weeks, I've also felt this kind of pushing on my pelvic floor but from the inside, such a weird sensation, and makes me feel like I need to peeIt's like he's trying to stomp or headbutt his way out or something!  

I'm a little sad because I feel like this pregnancy has just flown by so quickly, what with everything else I've had going on ie. work, helping out as a volunteer organising a charity event, selling a house and then buying a house.  I feel like I haven't stopped since falling pregnant, and haven't had enough spare time to simply savour the experience for what it is, to pregnant.  We don't plan on having any more children so I won't have this again.  I'm really hoping once we move in to our new house in a little under two weeks (when I will be nearly 37 weeks pregnant), that this bub will wait at least another week before making his grand arrival, so I can put my feet up and rejuvenate, and also just take in the wonder of being pregnant, for the last time.

My money is on him being born in my 38th week.  I really do feel he will come early, and considering Mia was born at 39 weeks, I think this one will be slightly earlier than that.  Although I would not mind one little bit if he stayed put just for a little longer!

I don't feel prepared for the labour and birth really, because if last time taught me anything, it's that you can plan for it but it won't necessarily eventuate how you think it will!  Based on last time I'm expecting the labour to be very fast, and the planning in my mind to this point has been focussed on "how can I get to the hospital in the quickest time possible?".  If I am in for another super-short labour, then I don't think I would bother with asking for any pain relief (and probably wouldn't have time to have the option anyway), possibly with the exception of the gas.  But who knows, it could turn out to be some long marathon of a labour!  Apart from the gas, I don't think I feel very comfortable with the other forms of administered pain relief.  The thought of an epidural freaks me out, although of course I realise I won't have a choice if it comes down to a caesarean being performed.  I'm hoping that won't be the case, just because I don't want to have to endure the long recovery time afterwards, but if the circumstances mean that is what's best for the baby then that is what I'll do.  My ideal labour/birth experience this time would be something between 4-6 hours, at a steady, rhythmic pace with breaks in between contractions, something that I can manage through the use of breathing, movement, varying postures and positive, loving words and support from Hubby.  And possibly some gas thrown in as needed :)

I'm not really feeling concerned about bringing him home, which is great considering the dark spiral I went in to last time.  I'm feeling pretty confident and excited about it all, I'm actually looking forward to having a baby around the place again!  Perhaps it's just been too long since the last time and I have a naive and false sense of security?!!

Sunday, April 6, 2014

14/52 - A portrait a week

Seriously, it's time for this week's photo again already?!  I feel like I was just doing this a minute ago!

That's a good thing, because time seems to be plodding along at a snail's pace for me lately, when all I want it to do is whizz by.  I know it's not good to wish away time, especially at this stage of what will be my last pregnancy, but I just want to have finished work and I just want to be in our new house!  And then time can slow down again, back to being all snail-like.  So I can just put my feet up for a bit before this baby comes.  Please?!

The photo above was taken this weekend as we arrived at a large factory outlet mall to shop for new car booster seats for Mia, so that the baby can have her old car seats.  Obviously, she feel asleep in the car on the way there and even after Hubby had lifted her out of the car once we parked, she found it hard to open those eyes back up.  This photo says a lot about the state of all three of us lately - barely able to keep our eyes open!  Poor Hubby has come down with a horrible cold after recently being off work for about three weeks thanks to aggravated asthma.  Mia is a little snotty, but not too bad.  However her misbehaviour and venomous attitude is OUT OF CONTROL at the moment, she is like a three-year-old-going-on-raving-psychotic!  There's definitely a whole other post worth of stuff to talk about there.  And me? I'm just counting down the days until I (hopefully) get to put my feet up in our new house, as said above!  I'm so tired all the time but find it hard to stay asleep through the whole night, and I have ALL THE PAINS everywhere.  Most things are just too much effort.  Send me a wah-mbulance!

I think we are all suffering from too much being crammed in to our little lives over the past 7 months or so, with still more huge changes on the horizon.  It will be nice once everything has eventuated, and life can ease in to some kind of natural rhythm for us once again.

I'm linking up with the 52 Project at Practising Simplicity :)  Check out host Jodi's portrait this week of her gorgeous daughter Poet - she's so beautiful!